All alone

My husband and his friend left on Monday for the lower mainland. Our friend is moving up to our area and they drove back to get the final load of stuff. I experienced some trepidation at the thought of being alone here for about ten days. Where has my independence gone? I like being alone, I had been a single mother raising three boys and supporting them myself. I have traveled to many places in the world by myself, I drove all over the Eastern USA by myself. Now all of a sudden I am worried about it. Why?

My husband and I have been married for 9 years. He is a 6′ 2″ Liverpudlian Crocodile Dundee. Very protective, can fix anything, a man among men. When did the time begin that I started to depend on him so much that I am dithering about driving the truck and doing a little shopping by myself. I drove everywhere up to 9 years ago but since I then have been quite happy to take the passenger seat.

I walked the dog down by the lake today, a fox was watching us but then thought it had better disappear as it caught sight of our dog. The bald eagles are starting to show up and I saw a couple start their courting flight. It is quite spectacular to see them fly high and then clasp the other eagle’s claws and then plummet to the ground breaking just before they hit.

It was gorgeous but then sky clouded over and we had a little hail. I had a friend visit me to see if I was lonely yet, and then I went over to a woman’s house who needed some computer help. I have had the TV on for company so I have seen a lot of shows I never watched before, currently the “The Recruit” with Al Pacino is in the background. I picked up a pile of books from the library and I have had no emergencies as yet.

Wednesday I drove in to Houston and bumped into a friend I hadn’t seen for almost two years. Bought myself two blouses and two pairs of pants and replaced the sunglasses I sat on! It was a lovely drive and I enjoyed myself. Today I cleaned up a bit because we are now in mud season and there are little piles of dirt all over the floor adorned with Annie hair in great balls and as someone invited themselves for tea this afternoon self respect required that I attend to it.

I even put myself on a bit of a diet to drop a few pounds while the men are away. It is so much easier to do when I am by myself. On the news they told us that we need to have less than 31″ waists, and that doctors would be waiting with a tape measure on our next visit. I think they are dreaming but since mine is a bit higher than that I though I would take Annie out a bit more since the weather is so nice and watch what I eat. So far since Monday I have lost 4lbs of winter blubber, mostly water I know but it all helps I suppose.

7 Responses

  1. I envy you the time alone! There’s always somebody else here and I would just love to have some time to myself. I think I would put on weight alone though, rather than lose it.

  2. Hi Grace,…I enjoy a calm and peaceful day by myself , every now and then…..What kind of diet are you on?? I am trying to make myself get back on track again with food.
    Come over and visit , if you get bored…….Baba

  3. Just checking in to see how you’re doing with your temporary single-hood… 😉

  4. I’m not alone here – not with the two little ones here in my care 95% of the time, plus the teen, my daughter, her husband – you get the picture. But, over the past 4-5 years I have changed my mode of operation a lot in that I used to think nothing of hopping in the car, driving here or there -to points I hadn’t been to in years and years maybe, or big city traffic – and think nothing of it. But today, I feel very much like a recluse – rarely leave the house, no phone calls (in or out) unless it is an absolute necessity with respect to my usage. I don’t know why or how exactly I turned into this hermit and I don’t really like it that much but…. can’t seem to find or bring myself to find an escape hatch to it right now.

  5. Thirty-one inches? Wish I could go back there. Ha!

  6. I understand what you’re saying…I’ve lost a lot of my sense of independence. I’ve also lost a lot of my physical strength though, through illness so I’ve come to depend on my hubman more. I’ve always had so much pride in my abilities (here comes the “fall” part!) so it’s been tough!
    He went out of town for an evening and I was a literal nutcase. And I’ve never felt a bit uneasy being alone! Blather…

  7. Is that 31″ holding your tummy in or letting it out? I’ve given up on my diet; I wasn’t eating and I wasn’t losing. Huh.

    Husband works away a lot and I like being alone except for the safety aspect.

    Hope you’re doing fine.

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